I really do. A lot.
Pondering, for me, happens at odd times and mostly when completing mundane tasks … like yesterday, as I was peeling potatoes for the most involved recipe for Irish stew. Seriously delicious though. I’ll post the recipe later.
I was alone. It was quiet.
These two conditions happening at the same time create a ponder-fest.
So, I did. Ponder, that is.
God has definitely been dealing with me on some issues (like He’s never not dealing with me) and this has been one of them: Worship.
Most of you know I’m a part of the worship team at our church and praise & worship is very close to my heart. Or should I say music is very close to my heart (you’ll understand the clarification in a minute). I’d say it’s a definite passion of mine and always has been. I love to worship God in this manner. I really do. Once again … always have for years.
But, I think we can all get a bit confused here.
Since when did “worship” mean music?
Who decided that singing and playing instruments was what worship was?
Who defined worship for us?
That’s what I was pondering.

From what I recall from the Bible, worship was something totally different.
I seem to remember it being bringing offerings and sacrifices, or going to hear the Word read aloud, or falling down prostrate. Never music.
Was it David that made us think that it’s songs? I realize throughout the Psalms that’s what He did and he was a man after God’s own heart. I get that. But, is that really worship? I’m just pondering again. Because honestly, I think the songs … the music … is more for us than for Him. More for our benefit. Not that it should be. Does it really just make us feel better? God doesn’t NEED our songs or our music. I’m sure He appreciates it. But, obviously, we’re the ones who need it. Look at all the emphasis we put on it at our churches.
But, I’m not really sure that’s what worship is.
God gave me a little insight yesterday. Totally strange how this happened amidst my pondering.
I was still peeling potatoes and pondering.
Beau walked in with the girls from school.
There is an afternoon routine that happens in our house after school, which involves grabbing a snack and homework. Nothing else happens until homework is done.
This can be a chore sometimes especially with La Petite Belle, who is very easily distracted and wants to talk, or do anything else but homework at this time.
Right before she sat down at the table to do her homework, she says, “Mommy, do you want to hear the song I made up today?”
I say, “Baby, not right now. I want you to sit down and do your homework.”
She proceeds to sing some of it.
I say, “I will listen to it later. Sit down and do your homework.”
I did want to hear her song, but it was way more important to me that she just do what I asked her to do … to just obey.
BAM! It’s like a had a little revelation of what God must feel with us.
The fact that she wrote a song for me was sweet, but that’s it. Sweet.
I wanted her to obey.
Do you think that’s how God feels?
I’m not saying He doesn’t want to hear our songs. Of course, He does. Just like I wanted to hear La Petite Belle’s. But, obedience first. The song was secondary.
So often, I think we want to forget about the obedience, which encompasses every aspect of our life and just shut God up with a song. “See, God? I love You. Listen to my song.” I wonder sometimes if He’s even listening or turns His ear because of the disobedience and indifference in our life.
I’m not saying He does. So, don’t freak out. I’m just pondering. Could He be?
Obedience is better than sacrifice, right?
I know when my child disobeys me, I really don’t want to hear her sing a song of love to me. I want her to repent and obey. I want her to change.
How ironic that we can sing a song to God about how wonderful He is and how much we want to give our lives to Him, but have hate/resentment/bitterness (plus a hundred other things) in our heart toward our brother.
Worship is love and adoration for our God, accompanied by a life of devotion to Him.
That’s it.
Simple, but extremely difficult.
John MacArthur, Jr. says: “That consuming, selfless desire to give to God is the essence and the heart of worship. It begins with the giving first of ourselves, and then of our attitudes, and then of our possessions — until worship is a way of life.”
A way of life.
That’s what it is.
The music we sing is such a small part of that way of life.
I’m just pondering here.
Your thoughts?