A few nights ago, as Beau and I were headed upstairs to bed, I said this:
“I can’t go to bed with onion hands.”
After which, he tweeted, trying to mock me, of course. But, anyone who cooks knew exactly what I meant. I had chopped onions when cooking dinner that night and the onion smell is hard to get rid of and sometimes takes a couple of washings.
So, what did I do? I proceeded to take my second bath of the evening. Yep. Just to wash my hands apparently.
I seem to have an issue with getting into bed with even the most minute piece of dirt, dust, speck, lint, whatever, on me. If I don’t feel squeaky clean, I’ll bathe again.
Now, don’t misunderstand me. I am a clean person and I don’t get dirty after taking my first baths. I just like to feel extra clean when climbing into the sheets. So, if I don’t, I take another one.
I don’t think it’s a big deal.
But, then I started thinking about some of the other things that HAVE to happen in order for me to go to sleep and now I’m wondering … hmmm … do other people have these same requirements?
Let me preface these with this statement:
I. LOVE. SLEEP.
It is very important to me and helps me to not be cranky.
And, when it is disturbed, it’s not pretty. Ask Beau.
Thus … these things are important to me being the happy, pleasant person that I am.
#1 – Have to be clean, like bath-taken-a-maximum-of-3-hours-before-bedtime clean.
(This doesn’t take into account the facial cleansing/moisturizing process, hair-brushing, tweezer-plucking, teeth-brushing, etc.)
#2 – I MUST have a noise machine of some sort on that either sounds like a fan, white noise, or rain. REALLY have a hard time sleeping without this.
#3 – Must apply Vick’s Vapo-Rub to lips.
(I know. Should discontinue use after 7 days & I’ve been doing this for 20 years. Ah well. I NEED IT!! I’m a Vick’s junkie.)
#4 – I must rub my foot back and forth. Pretty sure that’s from my sweet mommy rocking me. Didn’t realize I did it until Beau and I got married and I rubbed that foot on him. Since then, he has banned me from touching him with by rubbing foot, which leads me to …
#5 – I must cocoon myself with the covers, at least on one side, so that I can tuck that foot in so that I can rub the cocoon back and forth with that rubbing foot.
(Ah … just the thought makes me happy right now.)
#6 – I must interlock one arm into one of Beau’s arm.
(This one is negotiable. I can sleep without it, but I don’t like it.)
#7 – I usually need to take a Zyrtec.
#8 – It must be dark. I don’t understand how light can keep me awake when my eyes are closed. Ridiculous. But, Beau will, every now and then, blind my closed eyes with his cell phone light as he’s reading. Ugh.
#9 – Beau must not move.
#10 – I must be under a blanket. I don’t care how hot it is. I have to feel the weight of the covers on top of me to be able to sleep. I wish this wasn’t so because at my age, temperature affects me a lot more now. But, unfortunately this is non-negotiable.
#11 – My brain must shut up. This one’s hard to control.
#12 – Did I mention I have a special pillow? Yep.
But, I don’t think these are a big deal.
When they all align together, life is good.
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